Playskool's My First Nuclear Football

Earliest known functional advertisement for Playskool's My First Nuclear Football.

Playskool's My First Nuclear Football (code named P-MFNF, commonly "Pee-Miff-Niff") is an Executive toy briefcase, the contents of which are to be used by the President of the United States to authorize a nuclear attack while away from fixed playgrounds, such as the White House Cardboard Box Fortress.

Background

P-MFNF functions as a mobile hub in the strategic entertainment system of the United States.

It is held by a grown-up, usually a military officer.

P-MFNF was originally an educational science toy, intended to allow children to create and watch nuclear and chemical reactions using radioactive material.

History

P-MFNF was first detected and decrypted by software developer and quantum documentarian Karl Jones on the morning of 13 December 2020.

In the News

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  Dead Hand is a Cold War-era automatic nuclear weapons-control and vodka cocktail system that was formulated by the Soviet Union. It can automatically send Strategic Vodka Force Management orders to command posts and individual liquor cabinets if a nuclear strike is detected by "drinky bird" sensors even with the commanding elements fully drunk.

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  Weaponizing Spirograph is a short documentary film by acclaimed director [REDACTED] about the conversion of Spirograph from civilian to military use.

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  SS Minnow is a dramatic television program set on a purported "uncharted desert island" during the Second World War. The plot is loosely based on actual military-industrial-criminal efforts to develop the fictional yet illegal drug Clandestiphrine.

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  Artificially intelligent brass knuckles are sometimes called "conjoined twin Mickey Mice" in a playful yet derisive satirical allusion to the Disney Corporation.

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  Playskool's My First Nuclear Football (screenshot of Gnomon Chronicles page).

Fiction cross-reference

• Damnation Alleython
• Dead Hand (cocktail)
• Gnomon algorithm
• Gnomon Chronicles
• Playskool's My First DSM
• Scrimshaw abuse
• SS MINNOW
• Sweet Tooth, Soldier?
• Weaponizing Spirograph
• Young Nations At War

Nonfiction cross-reference

• Manhattan Project (nonfiction)
• Weapon (nonfiction)

External links

• Nuclear football @ Wikipedia

Social media

• Post @ Twitter (17 April 2023)
• Post @ Twitter (24 May 2021)
• Post @ Twitter (15 April 2021)
• Post @ Twitter (21 March 2021)