Coital cosmos

Coital Cosmos model infographic.

The Coital cosmos theory is a cosmological model of the observable universe from the earliest known periods of sexual arousal through its subsequent evolution into any of various sex acts.

Description

The model describes how the universe expanded from an initial state of extremely high density and high temperature erotic arousal, and offers a comprehensive explanation for a broad range of observed phenomena, including the abundance of light elements, the cosmic microwave background (CMB) radiation, and the "Peano Sex Curve" (an alleged transdimensional sexual topology which is said [by whom?] to exert pleasures normally unavailable to Euclidean organisms).

Flaw in model

Whoops—!
A flaw in the model—!
Plain text hashtag #WeHadSexAndNow
Image hashtag #WeJustHadSexAndNow
Well, let it stand; what is the worst that can—
TRANSMISSION ENDS
[Translator's log: memo to self, re-read "How to Build a Universe That Doesn’t Fall Apart Two Days Later"]

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Hashtags

Hashtags: #WeHadSexAndNow

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