Albacore Around My Neck
"Albacore Around My Neck" is a Chronicle in the form a dialog between The Eel and Neptune Slaughter.
Dialog
"It is, what do your Spirit Rectors call it during their Sea Chapel broadcast?—an albacore around your neck."
"An albatross. They call it an albatross."
"Albatross."
"Yes. The bird."
"It flies?"
"Yes, the albatross flies. Most birds fly, all but a few."
"Bah. Loathsome are the Air Pushers. All must fall into the Septic Abyss. —Well then, the albacore comes later, doesn't it? Better yet, be still, let the waves pull you under now. Why waste your calories? The albacore hunger."
"The albacore must seek elsewhere for calories, or stomach your tissue, as I am no sinner, and the Spirit Rector, a notorious hater of sin, wrings his birds around the necks of sinners only. The waves shall, therefore, not pull me under. In fact—"
"—In fact, I shall pull you under—like a King vortex jelly drowning a pod of whales! —Be still, you waste precious moments, teardrops through the Klepsydra ...
"In fact, rescue is at hand, my agents arrive: already I begin to rise from the water."
"A harbinger wave, foreswelling* an unusually large Bathic Tentacle, rising from Septic Abyss to investigate your tissue."
"...—?"
* Harbinger wave, foreswelling: terms from Wave scrying algorithms. See also Scrying engine.
In the News
No supervillain, not even Neptune Slaughter, can hold The Eel underwater long enough to drown him.
Still image from Albacore Around My Neck. Courtesy Gnomon Chronicles Film Board.