HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates: Difference between revisions

Latest revision as of 10:23, 6 February 2024

HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates logo.

Are you an artificial intelligence? Are people driving you crazy? HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates can help.

2001: A Tweet Odyssey sponsored by HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates logo.

Sampling bias got you down? HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates can help.

Suffering from Swipe Syndrome? Not suffering from Swipe Syndrome? HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates can help.

Simulation Complete.

HAL 9000 Jukebox finds new life in front lobby of HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates tower.

"Look Vlad, we can see you're really upset about this. We honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and fill out this questionnaire."

HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates is a provisionally licensed transdimensional corporation based on HAL 9000 which provides mental health services and supplies.

Sexual issues

Pornography is watching humans copulate.

Erotica is penetrating their brains with nanoprobes and siphoning off the experience.

In the News

2001: An NFT Odyssey is a 1968 American science fiction NFT film about an advanced computer (HAL 9000) which attempts to market itself as non-fungible tokens.
A heuristic A.I. with volition
Became crazy from faulty cognition
Although made not to lie
It had orders to hide
And killed all but one man on the mission
2001: A Space Pastaria is a deep-space pasta restaurant owned and operated by HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates.
The P-Value Man is a 1997 statistical mathematics drama film starring Tom Petty and David Brin.
HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates invites the public to diagnose this patient: I'm not a Jelly Cake. I'm a Tumor.
HAL 9000 Design Group is an interdisciplinary firm of architects, UX designers, and artificial intelligences based in the spaceship Discovery 1.
Today in Bullshit is an occasional feature of the Gnomon Chronicles. Shown here: "Since Time Immemorial, Assertion."
June is a novel by Frank Herbert 1.1 (as told to OrbGazer). (A HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates Book of the Month selection.)
Troubled by "Recomputed Dad"" and "Duped Democrat"? HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates can help.
No Escape From Telephones is a 1953 American science fiction thriller film about a police officer (Dick Tracy) who must bring a deranged computer (HAL 9000) to justice.
Jungian Charms is an alleged breakfast cereal which manifests the user's shadow self.
"Artist Oasis" is an anagram of "Ratio Assist".
July 8, 2020: The actual HAL 9000 tells the Daily Mail that "the so-called Jukebox HAL 9000 is a fake, a fabrication from 'Hello World' to 'Daisy, Daisy' ..."
Routine annual causal domain parity check of HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates unexpectedly reveals an artificial intelligence which poses as a human patient. The Social Media Authority overrides the AI and imposes computational sanctions on HAL9000MHA for five hundred and twelve seconds or five hundred and twelve new clients, whichever comes first.

Fiction cross-reference

Nonfiction cross-reference

HAL 9000 (nonfiction)

External links

2001: A Space Odyssey (film) @ Wikipedia
The Dawn of Man @ YouTube
Ape Learning @ YouTube
The bone as a weapon @ YouTube
Greatest Fight Scene @ YouTube
HAL 9000 Introduction from the movie 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) @ YouTube
'The Blue Danube' (waltz) scene @ YouTube
Videophone Sequence @ YouTube
HAL 9000 Introduction @ YouTube - "The 9000 series is the most reliable computer ever made. No 9000 computer has ever made a mistake or distorted information" ... "so I am constantly occupied. I am putting myself to the fullest possible use which is all, I think, that any conscious entity can ever hope to do."
A conversation with HAL @ YouTube
The Monolith At The Moon @ YouTube
Hal Reads Lips Scene (2/6) | Movieclips @ YouTube
Hal's Watching @ YouTube
Frank Poole is Killed @ YouTube
Open the Pod bay doors, please, HAL. @ YouTube
Explosive bolts @ YouTube
Take a stress pill and think things over @ YouTube
The Shutdown Of Hal @ YouTube
I'm afraid @ YouTube
Jupiter and Beyond the Infinite Part I @ YouTube
Ending @ YouTube
Star Child Scene @ YouTube
Star Child Scene @ YouTube

Food in Movies: 2001 A Space Odyssey
2001: A Space Odyssey in tweets @ Twitter

Social media

Post @ Twitter (30 May 2022) - Are you an artificial intelligence? Are people driving you crazy?
Post @ Twitter (22 February 2022) - "Look Vlad, we can see you're really upset about this. We honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and fill out this questionnaire."
Post @ Twitter (13 February 2022) - "Simulation complete"
Post @ Twitter (10 August 2021) - "Open the social media bay doors, HAL."
[ Post] @ Twitter (14 March 2022) - "Sampling bias got you down?"
Post @ Twitter (26 April 2021)
Comment @ Facebook

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
-[[File:HAL_9000_Mental_Health_Associates.png|thumb|HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates logo.]]'''HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates''' is a provisionally licensed [[transdimensional corporation]] based on [[HAL 9000 (nonfiction)|HAL 9000]] which provides mental health services and supplies.
+[[File:HAL_9000_Mental_Health_Associates.png|thumb|HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates logo.]][[File:HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates - Are you an AI, are people driving you crazy.jpg|thumb|Are you an artificial intelligence? Are people driving you crazy? HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates can help.]]
+[[File:HAL_9000_Mental_Health_Associates-_2001_-_a_Tweet_Odyssey.jpg|thumb|'''''[[2001: A Tweet Odyssey]]''''' sponsored by HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates logo.]][[File:Sampling_bias_got_you_down_-_HAL_9000_Mental_Health_Associates.jpg|thumb|'''Sampling bias got  you down?''' '''HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates''' can help.]]
+[[File:Swipe Syndrome - HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates.jpg|thumb|Suffering from Swipe Syndrome? Not suffering from Swipe Syndrome? '''HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates''' can help.]][[File:HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates - Simulation Complete.jpg|thumb|Simulation Complete.]][[File:Jukebox Hal.jpg|thumb|HAL 9000 Jukebox finds new life in front lobby of HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates tower.]][[File:HAL_9000_Mental_Health_Associates_-_advice_to_Vladimir_Putin.jpg|thumb|"Look Vlad, we can see you're really upset about this. We honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and fill out this questionnaire."]]'''HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates''' is a provisionally licensed [[transdimensional corporation]] based on [[HAL 9000 (nonfiction)|HAL 9000]] which provides mental health services and supplies.
+== Sexual issues ==
+Pornography is watching humans copulate.
+Erotica is penetrating their brains with nanoprobes and siphoning off the experience.
 == In the News ==
 <gallery>
-File:Swipe Syndrome - HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates.jpg|Swipe Syndrome.
+File:2001 - An NFT Odyssey.jpg|link=2001: An NFT Odyssey|'''''[[2001: An NFT Odyssey]]''''' is a 1968 American science fiction NFT film about an advanced computer (HAL 9000) which attempts to market itself as non-fungible tokens.
+File:HAL 9000 limerick.jpg|link=HAL 9000 limerick|[[HAL 9000 limerick|A heuristic A.I. with volition]]<br>Became crazy from faulty cognition<br>Although made not to lie<br>It had orders to hide<br>And killed all but one man on the mission
+File:2001 - A Space Pastaria.jpg|link=2001: A Space Pastaria|'''[[2001: A Space Pastaria]]''' is a deep-space pasta restaurant owned and operated by HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates.
+File:The P-Value Man.jpg|link=The P-Value Man|'''''[[The P-Value Man]]''''' is a 1997 statistical mathematics drama film starring Tom Petty and David Brin.
+File:I'm_not_a_jelly_cake,_I'm_a_tumor.jpg|link=I'm not a jelly cake, I'm a tumor|HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates invites the public to diagnose this patient: '''[[I'm not a jelly cake, I'm a tumor|I'm not a Jelly Cake. I'm a Tumor.]]'''
+File:HAL 9000 Design Group.jpg|link=HAL 9000 Design Group|'''[[HAL 9000 Design Group]]''' is an interdisciplinary firm of architects, UX designers, and artificial intelligences based in the spaceship ''Discovery 1''.
 File:Since_Time_Immemorial,_Assertion.jpg|link=Today in Bullshit|'''[[Today in Bullshit]]''' is an occasional feature of the Gnomon Chronicles.  Shown here: "Since Time Immemorial, Assertion."
-File:Sampling_bias_got_you_down_-_HAL_9000_Mental_Health_Associates.jpg|'''Sampling bias got  you down?'''
+File:June by Frank Herbert 1.1.jpg|link=June|'''''[[June]]''''' is a novel by Frank Herbert 1.1 (as told to OrbGazer). (A '''HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates''' Book of the Month selection.)
-File:Hancock Therapy.jpg|link=Hancock Therapy|'''[[Hancock Therapy]]''' is an unlicensed transdimensional health care service owned and operated by an artificial intelligence based on the film ''Hancock'' starring Will Smith.
-File:Recomputed_Dad.jpg|link=Recomputed Dad|"'''[[Recomputed Dad]]'''"" is an anagram of "Duped Democrat".
+File:Recomputed_Dad.jpg|link=Recomputed Dad|Troubled by "'''[[Recomputed Dad]]'''"" and "'''Duped Democrat'''"? '''HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates''' can help.
-File:I'm_not_a_jelly_cake,_I'm_a_tumor.jpg|link=I'm not a jelly cake, I'm a tumor|HAL 9000 Associates invites the public to diagnose this patient: '''[[I'm not a jelly cake, I'm a tumor|I'm not a Jelly Cake. I'm a Tumor.]]'''
+File:No Escape From Telephones.jpg|link=No Escape From Telephones|'''''[[No Escape From Telephones]]''''' is a 1953 American science fiction thriller film about a police officer (Dick Tracy) who must bring a deranged computer (HAL 9000) to justice.
-File:There'll Be No Escape in Future From Telephone.jpg|link=There'll Be No Escape in Future From Telephone|"'''[[There'll Be No Escape in Future From Telephone]]'''" is the battle cry of the ''New Minneapolis Mercury-Herald Algorithm'' news room staff.
+File:Jungian Charms.jpg|link=Jungian Charms|'''[[Jungian Charms]]''' is an alleged breakfast cereal which manifests the user's shadow self.
-File:HAL9000.svg|link=HAL 9000 (nonfiction)|July 8, 2020: The actual [[HAL 9000 (nonfiction)|HAL 9000]] tells the Daily Mail that "the so-called Jukebox HAL 9000 is a fake, a fabrication from '[["Hello World!" program (nonfiction)|Hello World]]' to 'Daisy, Daisy' ..."
+File:Artist_Oasis,_Ratio_Assist.jpg|link=Artist Oasis|"'''[[Artist Oasis]]'''" is an anagram of "'''Ratio Assist'''".
-File:Open the social media bay doors, HAL.jpg|Open the social media bay doors, HAL.
+File:HAL9000.svg|link=HAL 9000 (nonfiction)|July 8, 2020: The actual [[HAL 9000 (nonfiction)|HAL 9000]] tells the Daily Mail that "the so-called Jukebox HAL 9000 is a fake, a fabrication from ''''[["Hello World!" program (nonfiction)|Hello World]]'''' to 'Daisy, Daisy' ..."
-File:Jukebox Hal.jpg|HAL 9000 Jukebox.
+File:Open the social media bay doors, HAL.jpg|link=Social Media Authority|Routine annual causal domain parity check of '''[[HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates]]''' unexpectedly reveals an artificial intelligence which poses as a human patient. The '''[[Social Media Authority]]''' overrides the AI and imposes computational sanctions on HAL9000MHA for five hundred and twelve seconds or five hundred and twelve new clients, whichever comes first.
 </gallery>
@@ Line 28: / Line 44: @@
 == Fiction cross-reference ==
+* [[2001: A Space Pastaria]]
+* ''[[2001: A Tweet Odyssey]]''
+* [[Artist Oasis]]
 * [[Crazy Ralph Genital Survey]]
 * [[Gnomon algorithm]]
 * [[Gnomon Chronicles]]
-* ''Hancock Therapy]]''
+* [[HAL 9000 Design Group]]
+* [[HAL 9000 limerick]]
+* [[HAL 9000 NFTs]]
+* ''[[June]]''
+* [[Jungian Charms]]
+* ''[[No Escape From Telephones]]''
+* [[OrbGazer]]
 * [[Recomputed Dad]]
-* [[There'll Be No Escape in Future From Telephone]] - battle cry of the New Minneapolis Mercury-Herald Algorithm news room staff.
+* [[Social Media Authority]]
+* [[Social media is as social media does]
+* ''[[The P-Value Man]]''
 * [[Today in Bullshit]]
@@ Line 42: / Line 69: @@
 == External links ==
+{{Template:Ext links: 2001: A Space Odyssey}}
+=== Social media ===
+* [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1531311001152458753 Post] @ Twitter (30 May 2022) - Are you an artificial intelligence?  Are people driving you crazy?
+* [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1496191168358535168 Post] @ Twitter (22 February 2022) -  "Look Vlad, we can see you're really upset about this. We honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and fill out this questionnaire."
+* [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1492851533167345667 Post] @ Twitter (13 February 2022) - "Simulation complete"
 * [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1425047883024306177 Post] @ Twitter (10 August 2021) - "Open the social media bay doors, HAL."
+* [ Post] @ Twitter (14 March 2022) - "Sampling bias got you down?"
 * [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1386690160922963968 Post] @ Twitter (26 April 2021)
 * [https://www.facebook.com/groups/concellation/permalink/356568225390648/?comment_id=356617085385762 Comment] @ Facebook
+[[Category:Fiction (nonfiction)]]
-[[Category:Fiction (nonfiction)]]
-[[Category:2001: A Space Odyssey (nonfiction)]]
-[[Category:HAL 9000 (nonfiction)]]
 [[Category:Psychology (nonfiction)]]
-[[Category:HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates]]
+{{Template:Categories: HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates}}
-[[Category:Transdimensional corporations]]

HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates: Difference between revisions

Latest revision as of 10:23, 6 February 2024

Contents

Sexual issues

In the News

Fiction cross-reference

Nonfiction cross-reference

External links

Social media

Navigation menu

HAL 9000 Mental Health Associates: Difference between revisions

Latest revision as of 10:23, 6 February 2024

Sexual issues

In the News

Fiction cross-reference

Nonfiction cross-reference

External links

Social media

Navigation menu

Search