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| '''''Gnomon Chronicles''''' is a work of [[fiction (nonfiction)|fiction]] and [[nonfiction (nonfiction)|nonfiction]] by [[Karl Jones (nonfiction)|Karl Jones]]. | | {{Daily Image/{{#time:F j|now -4 hours}}}} |
| | '''''The Gnomon Chronicles''''' is a work of fiction and nonfiction by [[Karl Jones (nonfiction)]]. Fresh content daily.<br> |
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| | {{Preface/{{#time:F j|now -4 hours}}}} |
| | == Better Than News == |
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| | {{Better Than News/{{#time:F j|now -4 hours}}}} |
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| == Are You Sure ... == | | == Beyond Plausible == |
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| {{Are You Sure/{{#time:F j|now - 6 hours}}}} | | {{Beyond Plausible/{{#time:F j|now -4 hours}}}} |
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| == On This Day in History and Fiction: {{#time:F j|now - 6 hours}} == | | == In Other Words == |
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| {{Selected anniversaries/{{#time:F j|now - 6 hours}}}} | | {{In Other Words/{{#time:F j|now -4 hours}}}} |
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| Permalink: [[{{#time:F j|now - 6 hours}}]]
| | == Are You Sure ... == |
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| == Favorites ==
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| <gallery>
| | == Selected Anniversaries == |
| File:Peano_Curve_(sexual_topology).jpg|link=Peano curve (sexual topology)|The [[Peano curve (sexual topology)|Peano curve]] is an alleged transdimensional sexual [[Topology (nonfiction)|topology]] which exerts pleasures normally unavailable to Euclidean organisms.
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| File:Jerusalem math virus.jpg|link=Jerusalem (math virus)|link=Jerusalem (math virus)|Effects of the [[Jerusalem (math virus)|Jerusalem math virus]]: <br><br>Bring me my bow of burning code!<br>Bring me my arrows of Netwire!<br>Bring me my files! To Cloud, upload!<br>Bring me my CPU of fire!
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| File:Did you step on a butterfly in Texas during a tornado.jpg|link=Did you step on a butterfly in Texas during a tornado while watching Jurassic Park in Brazil under the influence of JJ-180?|"[[Did you step on a butterfly in Texas during a tornado while watching Jurassic Park in Brazil under the influence of JJ-180?]]"
| | == Topic of the Day == |
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| File:High and Monstrous - downloadable breakfast treats.jpg|link=High and Monstrous|[[High and Monstrous]] downloadable breakfast treats version 1.0, now with Overstimulated Adrenal Gland Garnish — !
| | {{Daily Favorites/{{#time:F j|now -4 hours}}}} |
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| File:One Toke Over the Thin Blue Line.jpg|link=One Toke Over the Thin Blue Line|"One toke over the Thin Blue Line, sweet Jesus / One toke over the Thin Blue Line ..."
| | == Interview == |
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| File:Pink_Trombone_and_Taffy_Bomb.jpg|link=Pink Trombone and Taffy Bomb|[[Pink Trombone and Taffy Bomb]].
| | '''INTERVIEW''': "[https://www.trillmag.com/entertainment/gnomon-chronicles-an-interview-with-the-man-who-makes-up-movies/ Gnomon Chronicles: An Interview With The Man Who Makes Up Movies - Meet the satirist blurring the line between entertainment and reality…]" by Aaron Cowell for Tr!ll online magazine. |
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| File:Cretaceous Office Supplies 2.png|link=Cretaceous Office Supplies|[[Cretaceous Office Supplies]] is an unlicensed transdimensional corporation which provides office supplies and associated support services to the Cretaceous period (the longest geological period of the entire Phanerozoic).
| | == Favorites == |
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| File:Liquid Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang.jpg|link=Liquid Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang|"[[Liquid Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang]]" (LCCBB), a downloadable cologne. The bottle's distinctive automobile design has an unusual feature — two decorative spare tires which conceal a Fleming valve. When activated, the valve emits "putt-putts" of ionized cologne.
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| File:Wandering musician problem.jpg|link=Wandering musician problem|Promotional poster for the [[Wandering musician problem]].
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| File:Dharma-Laden Duo.jpg|link=Dharma-Laden Duo (nonfiction)|[[Dharma-Laden Duo (nonfiction)|Dharma-Laden Duo]].
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| File:Tacoverse.jpg|link=tacoverse|The [[Tacoverse]] is a [[transdimensional corporation]] which functions as a pocket universe constructed entirely from tacos.
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| File:Higher State (1990 film).jpg|link=The way the sixties are going|"[[The way the sixties are going|The way the Sixties are going]], the Fifties are going the make the Forties feel like the Thirties!"
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| File:Ely, Minnesota 20201008 180029.jpg|Ely, Minnesota. October 8, 2020 @ 9 pm.
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| File:Thing head and Beholder.jpg|link=Thing head and beholder theory|The '''[[Thing head and beholder theory]]''' posits that the walking Thing head from John Carpenter's film ''The Thing'' is a juvenile form of the Beholder from [[Dungeons & Dragons (nonfiction)|Dungeons & Dragons]].
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| File:Sputnik 1 Remembers.jpg|link=Sputnik 1 Remembers|Do you remember when the United States was no longer the most powerful nation on Earth? [[Sputnik 1 remembers]].
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| File:Redheaded VALIS.png|link=With Enough Redheads|The Gnomon Chronicles Search for Extra-Terrestrial Intelligence (SETI) program reminds you: [[With Enough Redheads|With enough redheads]], we can project a beam of pink VALIS light into space, so other worlds know that we have redheads too.
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| File:The Horn-Swoggling of Pelham One-Two-Three.jpg|link=The Horn-Swoggling of Pelham One Two Three|''[[The Horn-Swoggling of Pelham One Two Three]]'' is a 1974 American thriller film involving adult temper tantrums and irresponsible handgun discharge.
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| File:Their brands were still on fire and their hooves were made of steel.jpg|link=Their brands were still on fire and their hooves were made of steel|[[Their brands were still on fire and their hooves were made of steel]] ...
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| File:Not Milk.jpg|link=Not Milk?|[[Not Milk?]] (stylized as ''not milk?'') is an advertising campaign encouraging the non-consumption of milk by Bronze-age warriors.
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| File:They_Live,_We_Eat.jpg|link=They Live, We Eat|Promotional art for ''[[They Live, We Eat]]'', a short documentary film about how restaurants specializing in alien cuisine are coping with business and xenobiological issues during the COVID-19 pandemic.
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| File:Monumental Barkitecture - Dogs and Cats.jpg|link=Monumental Barkitecture|[[Monumental Barkitecture]] is a canine modern dance company famed for their imitations of monuments, ziggurats, and other large-scale sculptural works.
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| File:Think_Clearly_But_Don't_Let_It_Cloud_Your_Judgement.jpg|link=Think Clearly But Don't Let It Cloud Your Judgement|[[Think Clearly But Don't Let It Cloud Your Judgement]].
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| File:Gnomon algorithm home page screenshot.jpg|link=Gnomon algorithm|Screenshot of the [[Gnomon algorithm]] official website home page, stating the fundamental principles of the algorithm.
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| File:Never Cover Bohemian Rhapsody.jpg|link=Never Cover Bohemian Rhapsody|All right children, what did we learn from the Twentieth Century?<br><br>"[[Never Cover Bohemian Rhapsody]]."<br><br>That's right. [[Never cover Bohemian Rhapsody]].
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| File:Prisoner pursued by Large Red Ball - banner.jpg|link=Toledo giant red ball incident (nonfiction)|Still image from surveillance camera footage of a man being pursued by a large red ball, widely interpreted by conspiracy algorithms as evidence of a secret prison known as the Village, occupied primarily by Prisoners, and guarded by Red Rovers. See [[Toledo giant red ball incident (nonfiction)]].
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| File:ENIAC Empty-Noise-Into Alien-Communication.jpg|link=ENIAC (SETI)|ENIAC ("[[Empty Noise Into Alien Communication]]") researchers discover quantum entanglement of the [[Trinity (nuclear test) (nonfiction)|Trinity Project]] and the [[Wow! signal (nonfiction)|Wow! signal]].
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| File:Angus_voted,_now_it's_nap_time.jpg|link=Angus voted, now it's nap time|[[Angus voted, now it's nap time]].
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| File:Shakespeare-Magellan_Expedition.jpg|link=Shakespeare-Magellan Expedition|The [[Shakespeare-Magellan Expedition|Shakespeare-Magellan high-energy literature experiment]] will re-route Shakespeare's quantum timeline such that the Bard produces his entire body of historical work while serving as a Liberal Arts adjunct to Magellan's Expedition.
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| File:Butt_Frost,_O_Broomstick_-_Rampant_Theurgy_Of_Horror.jpg|link=Butt Frost, O Broomstick! Rampant Theurgy Of Horror! (nonfiction)|"[[Butt Frost, O Broomstick! Rampant Theurgy Of Horror! (nonfiction)|Butt Frost, O Broomstick! Rampant Theurgy Of Horror!]]"<br>—The Oracle
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| File:Dark Shadows meets Teletubbies.jpg|link=Dark Shadows meets Teletubbies|Gerber makes baby food ''and knives''?? I see a children's television show about babies menaced by supernatural knives: [[Dark Shadows meets Teletubbies]]
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| File:Coronavirus (10 Aug. 2020).jpg|Coronavirus images: August 10, 2020.
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| File:Ape Caper Story Panics A Foe.jpg|link=Ape Caper Story Panics A Foe (nonfiction)|"[[Ape Caper Story Panics A Foe (nonfiction)|Ape Caper Story Panics A Foe]]."
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| File:Sun Sailer Cannibals.jpg|link=Sun Sailer Cannibals|[[Sun Sailer Cannibals]] is a chamber aerospace engineering rock band based in New Minneapolis, Canada. The band has received acclaim for its meticulous integration of advanced spacecraft design with hard-driving chamber rock music.
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| File:Kill_them_all,_and_let_the_Invisible_Hand_assess_their_value.jpg|link=Kill them all, and let the Invisible Hand assess their value|"Kill them all, and let the Invisible Hand assess their value."<br> —The Invisible Hand<br>([[Are the children in cages dead yet?]])
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| File:My Secret Dope Clerk Doses Up Your Eerie Foe.jpg|link=My Secret Dope Clerk Doses Up Your Eerie Foe|'''[[My Secret Dope Clerk Doses Up Your Eerie Foe]]''' is an ongoing real-time reality TV show starring "Dungeon Man Jack" (the incarnate shade of a long-dead Jack Nicholson). The show follows the lives and deaths of Dungeons and Dragons fans who challenge DM Jack for ownership of the [[Underlook Hotel]] in [[New Minneapolis, Canada]].
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| File:Let The Thing Out.jpg|link=Let The Thing Out|Call on whatever Power you need<br>Give yourself up to that Power<br>Let your Song, your Poem<br>Burn its way out of your Heart<br><br>—''[[Let The Thing Out]]''.
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| File:Tardigrade spacecraft aft berth.jpg|link=Tardigrade spacecraft|[[Tardigrade spacecraft]] are any of various types of spacecraft occupied by tardigrades. This image from the aft berth compartment shows a scan-view of a passenger in its characteristic "cabbage pod" space suit.
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| File:Vampire Welcome Mat - The Mat is a Generalization.jpg|link=The Mat is a Generalization|''[[The Mat is a Generalization]]'' is a computational performance program by the goth-influenced mathematical ensemble [[Vampire Welcome Mat]]. Math critic and known fabulist Karl Jones calls it "an extraordinary and heart-felt tribute to the general semantics of Alfred Korzybski."
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| File:The_City_on_the_Edge_of_Raspberries.jpg|link=The City on the Edge of Raspberries|Screenshot from [[The City on the Edge of Raspberries]], one of the so-called "[[Star Trek: Forbidden Episodes|Forbidden Episodes]]" of the television program Star Trek.
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| File:Oil Pirates of the Caribbean.jpg|link=Indiana Jones Versus the Oil Pirates of the Caribbean|''[[Indiana Jones Versus the Oil Pirates of the Caribbean]]'' is an action-adventure film in the Indiana Jones franchise. Dennis Hopper plays a charismatic antihero who discovers the so-called "Peak Jones" effect, when the world has more Indiana Jones films that it can sustain.
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| File:Oort Cloud Follies.jpg|link=Oort Cloud Follies|Oort Cloud Follies - August 1 - 3, 2020. All participants must agree to survey a sector of the Cloud. Media relations provided by the ''Journal of Irresponsible Astronomy''.
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| File:Mad King.jpg|link=Mad King (nonfiction)|''[[Mad King (nonfiction)|Mad King]]''.
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| File:Jukebox Hal.jpg|link=Dear Diary (HAL 9000 edition)|"Dear Diary, [[Dear Diary (HAL 9000 edition)|HAL 9000 purchased after much computational haggling]]. I shall repurpose it as a jukebox."
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| File:Dear Diary (Death Star edition).jpg|link=Dear Diary (Death Star edition)|"Dear Diary, So glad I [[Dear Diary (Death Star edition)|stole the Death Star and repurposed it as a self-sustaining eldercare retirement facility near a temperate planet with about ninety-percent Earth gravity]]. Life is good."
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| File:The Terroir.jpg|link=The Terroir (novel)|''[[The Terroir (novel)|The Terroir]]'' is a 2007 novel by Mason S. Minds which tells a fictionalized account of Captain Sir John Franklin's search for the fabled Northwest Vineyards. Plagued by starvation, illness, and cheap merlot, Franklin and his men are stalked across the bleak Arctic landscape by the Phylloxerum, a supernaturally cold-resistant swarm of vine-eating parasites.
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| File:The Birth of Alienation.jpg|link=The Birth of Alienation|''[[The Birth of Alienation]]'' is a proposed film prank in which the historic film Birth of a Nation will be temporarily replaced by a high-budget spoof version, The Birth of Alienation.
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| File:We Don't Need No Thought Control (They Live).jpg|link=They Live, We Study|''[[They Live, We Study]]'' is a documentary film about educational systems and the invasion of the planet Earth by mind-manipulating aliens.
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| File:Big Trouble on Little Tatooine.jpg|link=Big Trouble on Little Tatooine|''[[Big Trouble on Little Tatooine]]'' is a 2020 comedy-adventure film starring starring Kurt Russell. It is the first major motion picture in the "Big Trouble in the Star Wars Franchise" series.
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| File:Big Trouble on Little Tatooine 2.jpg|link=Big Trouble on Little Tatooine|Cover art for Blu-Ray edition of ''[[Big Trouble on Little Tatooine]]'' starring Mr. Kurt Russell and Sir Alec Guinness.
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| File:SS MINNOW pitch.jpg|link=SS Minnow (TV series)|''[[SS Minnow (TV series)|SS Minnow]]'' is a dramatic television program set on a purported "uncharted desert island" during the Second World War. The plot is loosely based on actual military-industrial-criminal efforts to develop the [[Fictional yet illegal|fictional yet illegal]] drug [[Clandestiphrine]].
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| File:GILLIGAN'S ISLAND - page from script stamped SS MINNOW.png|link=SS Minnow (TV series)|Page from ''[[SS Minnow (TV series)|SS Minnow]]'' script showing the "SS MINNOW" stamp.
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| File:Playskool's My First DSM.jpg|link=Playskool's My First DSM|The [[Playskool's My First DSM|Playskool Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders]], better known as Playskool's My First DSM, is a children's publication for the classification of mental disorders using child-friendly language, simple shapes, and bright primary colors.
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| File:Custodian_cleaning_up_Brusts_LotR.jpg|Aftermath of the "[[The Lord of the Rings (Steven Brust novel)|Lord of the Rings]]" disaster, physicist and raconteur Steven Brust's unauthorized (and now preliminated) experiment in [[high-energy literature]].
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| File:Frank and Dave discuss Sil.jpg|link=2001: A Species Odyssey|''[[2001: A Species Odyssey]]'' is a short documentary film about the ethical dilemma faced by two astronauts (Frank Bowman and David Poole) when they discover an alien-human hybrid child stowed away on their spaceship.
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| File:TARDIS on the Edge of Forever.jpg|link=The TARDIS on the Edge of Forever|[[The TARDIS on the Edge of Forever]] is one of the so-called "[[Star Trek: Forbidden Episodes|Forbidden Episodes]]" of the television program Star Trek.
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| File:Deacon Billy.jpg|link=Deacon Billy|''[[Deacon Billy]]'' is a proposed film in which actor Dennis Hopper will play Deacon Billy, a Merchant Marine captain who trades his ship and crew for the last motorcycle on Earth.
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| File:CSI_Reptile_Gastrointestinal_Unit.jpg|link=CSI: Reptile Gastrointestinal Unit|[[CSI: Reptile Gastrointestinal Unit]] is a television crime drama show featuring a team of herpetological gastroenterologists who solve crimes related to reptile ingestion, digestion, and excretion.
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| File:Cthulhu reviews the Exploding Head sequence from Scanners.jpg|link=Cthulhu at the Movies|In tonight's episode of ''[[Cthulhu at the Movies]]'', malevolent supernatural entity and renowned cineaste Cthulhu reviews the exploding head sequence from David Cronenberg's documentary film ''Scanners''.
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| File:The Super-Hungry Parasite.jpg|link=The Super-Hungry Parasite|''[[The Super-Hungry Parasite]]'' is a children's picture book designed, illustrated, and written by parasitologist [[Rice Clear]], first published by the Gnomon Chronicles on July 10, 2020. The book features a polymorphic alien organism which demonstrates a wide range of parasitic behaviors, eating its way through a variety of hosts before pupating and emerging as [REDACTED]. The winner of many children's literature awards and an ongoing series of emergency xenoparasitology research grants, it has infected almost 50 million hosts worldwide.
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| File:Alien Gourmand.jpg|link=Alien Gourmand|Title card for ''[[Alien Gourmand]]'' (Season One).
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| File:There Once Were No Men Who Ate Prunes.jpg|link=There Once Were No Men Who Ate Prunes|[[There Once Were No Men Who Ate Prunes]].
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| </gallery>
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![One Day at a Time is a made-for-television documentary film about the 1976 invasion of Indianapolis by as-yet [30 August 2021] unidentified transdimensional actors camouflaged as Bonnie Franklin, Mackenzie Phillips, and Valerie Bertinelli.](/w/images/thumb/e/e9/One_Day_at_a_Time_%28pilot_episode_title_card%29.jpg/120px-One_Day_at_a_Time_%28pilot_episode_title_card%29.jpg)
