Cretaceous Office Supplies: Difference between revisions

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[[File:Cretaceous_Office_Supplies_-_Pleistocene_Special_Courier_Services.jpg|thumb|Cretaceous Office Supplies:  Pleistocene Special Courier Services.]]
[[File:Cretaceous_Office_Supplies_-_Pleistocene_Special_Courier_Services.jpg|thumb|Cretaceous Office Supplies:  Pleistocene Special Courier Services.]]
[[File:Cretaceous Office Supplies 2.png|thumb|Cretaceous Office Supplies promotional poster concept art.]]'''Cretaceous Office Supplies''' is an unlicensed [[transdimensional corporation]] which provides office supplies and associated support services to the Cretaceous period (the longest geological period of the entire Phanerozoic).
[[File:Cretaceous Office Supplies 2.png|thumb|Cretaceous Office Supplies promotional poster concept art.]]'''Cretaceous Office Supplies''' is an unlicensed [[transdimensional corporation]] which provides office supplies and associated support services to the Cretaceous period (the longest geological period of the entire Phanerozoic).
== In the News ==
<gallery>
File:A_Field_Guide_to_Edible_Theropods.jpg|link=A Field Guide to Edible Theropods|''[[A Field Guide to Edible Theropods]]'' is a book about preparing, cooking, serving, and eating various theropods.
File:Time Enough in Layers.jpg|link=Time Enough in Layers|"'''[[Time Enough in Layers]]'''": A geologist (Meredith Burgess-Shale) unleashes a global nuclear holocaust in order to find a rare trilobite. (The Twilight Zone: Forbidden Episodes)
File:Cretaceous Twitter.jpg|link=Cretaceous Twitter|'''[[Cretaceous Twitter]]''' is a time travel research project which extends Twitter into the Cretaceous period.
File:Staple strip glue.jpg|link=Glue Your Own Staple Strips|'''''[[Glue Your Own Staple Strips]]''''' is a short nonfiction book describing how and why to glue individual staples into strips.
File:Tacky (TV series).jpg|link=Tacky|'''''[[Tacky]]''''' is an American sitcom about the employees of the fictional Sunshine Adhesives Company in Manhattan.
File:So,_it_has_come_to_Miami_Shark.jpg|link=So, it has come to Miami Shark|'''[[So, it has come to Miami Shark]]'''.
File:Frondo_Ediacar_and_his_Mighty_Mighty_Rangeomorphs.jpg|link=Frondo Ediacar|'''[[Frondo Ediacar]]''' is the stage name of paleontologist and musician [REDACTED]. Ediacar is known for his elaborate stage productions, including hermetically sealed performance spaces which replicate environmental conditions of the pre-Cambrian era.
</gallery>


== Evolution of Cretaceous marine office supplies ==
== Evolution of Cretaceous marine office supplies ==
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[[APTO]] marine algorithm theorists believe that the House of Malevecchio is secretly diverting office supplies from the Cretaceous to some period outside the Phanerozoic for use by marine cryptid and alleged supervillain [[Neptune Slaughter]].
[[APTO]] marine algorithm theorists believe that the House of Malevecchio is secretly diverting office supplies from the Cretaceous to some period outside the Phanerozoic for use by marine cryptid and alleged supervillain [[Neptune Slaughter]].
== History ==
Cretaceous Office Supplies was first detected and reported by author and [[APTO]] stringer [[Karl Jones (nonfiction)|Karl Jones]] in a [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1324757981205012483 Twitter post] on the morning of 6 November 2020.
== In the News ==
<gallery>
File:A_Field_Guide_to_Edible_Theropods.jpg|link=A Field Guide to Edible Theropods|''[[A Field Guide to Edible Theropods]]'' is a book about preparing, cooking, serving, and eating various theropods.
File:So,_it_has_come_to_Miami_Shark.jpg|link=So, it has come to Miami Shark|'''[[So, it has come to Miami Shark]]'''.
File:Frondo_Ediacar_and_his_Mighty_Mighty_Rangeomorphs.jpg|link=Frondo Ediacar|Musician-paleontologist [[Frondo Ediacar]] an "an epochal internship position" with Cretaceous Office Supplies during his youth. He became lost during the upper Cretaceous when an exceptionally complex inventory algorithm crashed on a heisenbug, and was eventually declared dead. Ediacar unexpectedly returned to contemporary time, having survived five weeks alone in the late Cretaceous (within a half-million years of the [[Cretaceous–Paleogene extinction event (nonfiction)|K–Pg extinction event]]), an experience he would later write about in the song "[[Asteroids Belt]]".
</gallery>


== Fiction cross-reference ==
== Fiction cross-reference ==


* [[Cretaceous Twitter]]
* [[Crimes against geological constants]]
* [[Crimes against geological constants]]
* [[Did you step on a butterfly in Texas during a tornado while watching Jurassic Park in Brazil under the influence of JJ-180?]]
* [[Did you step on a butterfly in Texas during a tornado while watching Jurassic Park in Brazil under the influence of JJ-180?]]
* [[Frondo Ediacar]]
* [[Frondo Ediacar]]
* ''[[Glue Your Own Staple Strips]]''
* [[Gnomon algorithm]]
* [[Gnomon algorithm]]
* [[Gnomon Chronicles]]
* [[Gnomon Chronicles]]
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* [[Phanerozoic Management Systems]]
* [[Phanerozoic Management Systems]]
* [[So, it has come to Miami Shark]]
* [[So, it has come to Miami Shark]]
* ''[[Tacky]]''
* [[Time Enough in Layers]]
* [[Transdimensional corporation]]
* [[Transdimensional corporation]]


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== External links ==
== External links ==


* [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1387175329916129284 Post] @ Twitter (27 April 2021)
* [https://twitter.com/cykesd/status/1324296766519463938 Post] @ Twitter (27 April 2021)
* [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1359698946168389632 Post] @ Twitter (7 April 2021) - "You insisted, so we existed!"
* [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cretaceous Cretaceous] @ Wikipedia
* [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cretaceous Cretaceous] @ Wikipedia
* [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diplomoceratidae Diplomoceratidae] @ Wikipedia
* [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diplomoceratidae Diplomoceratidae] @ Wikipedia
* [https://phys.org/news/2020-11-ancient-squid-like-creature-paperclip-shaped-shell.html Ancient squid-like creature with paperclip-shaped shell may have lived for hundreds of years] @ Phys.org
* [https://phys.org/news/2020-11-ancient-squid-like-creature-paperclip-shaped-shell.html Ancient squid-like creature with paperclip-shaped shell may have lived for hundreds of years] @ Phys.org
* [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paper_size Paper size] @ Wikipedia
* [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paper_size Paper size] @ Wikipedia
=== Social media ===
* [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1540008463123742728 Post] @ Twitter (23 June 2022)
* [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1387175329916129284 Post] @ Twitter (27 April 2021)
* [https://twitter.com/cykesd/status/1324296766519463938 Post] @ Twitter (27 April 2021)
* [https://twitter.com/GnomonChronicl1/status/1359698946168389632 Post] @ Twitter (7 April 2021) - "You insisted, so we existed!"




Latest revision as of 07:41, 12 September 2023

Cretaceous Office Supplies: Pleistocene Special Courier Services.
Cretaceous Office Supplies promotional poster concept art.

Cretaceous Office Supplies is an unlicensed transdimensional corporation which provides office supplies and associated support services to the Cretaceous period (the longest geological period of the entire Phanerozoic).

In the News

  • A Field Guide to Edible Theropods is a book about preparing, cooking, serving, and eating various theropods.

    A Field Guide to Edible Theropods is a book about preparing, cooking, serving, and eating various theropods.

  • "Time Enough in Layers": A geologist (Meredith Burgess-Shale) unleashes a global nuclear holocaust in order to find a rare trilobite. (The Twilight Zone: Forbidden Episodes)

    "Time Enough in Layers": A geologist (Meredith Burgess-Shale) unleashes a global nuclear holocaust in order to find a rare trilobite. (The Twilight Zone: Forbidden Episodes)

  • Cretaceous Twitter is a time travel research project which extends Twitter into the Cretaceous period.

    Cretaceous Twitter is a time travel research project which extends Twitter into the Cretaceous period.

  • Glue Your Own Staple Strips is a short nonfiction book describing how and why to glue individual staples into strips.

    Glue Your Own Staple Strips is a short nonfiction book describing how and why to glue individual staples into strips.

  • Tacky is an American sitcom about the employees of the fictional Sunshine Adhesives Company in Manhattan.

    Tacky is an American sitcom about the employees of the fictional Sunshine Adhesives Company in Manhattan.

  • Frondo Ediacar is the stage name of paleontologist and musician [REDACTED]. Ediacar is known for his elaborate stage productions, including hermetically sealed performance spaces which replicate environmental conditions of the pre-Cambrian era.

    Frondo Ediacar is the stage name of paleontologist and musician [REDACTED]. Ediacar is known for his elaborate stage productions, including hermetically sealed performance spaces which replicate environmental conditions of the pre-Cambrian era.

Evolution of Cretaceous marine office supplies

Office supply needs were simpler during the Cretaceous period.

Oceans were dominated by enormous reams of Legal standard paper.

The more familiar "Letter" standard of our day evolved later, in response to evolutionary pressure towards leaner, "just-in-time" organisms.

Etymology

The name Cretaceous is derived from the Latin creta, 'chalk', which is appears abundantly in the fossil records of classrooms and lecture halls during latter half of the period.

Transdimensional analysis

Cretaceous Office Supplies is officially an ephemeral manifestation of Phanerozoic Management Systems, a licensed but repeatedly censured transdimensional holding company widely believed to be a front for the nefarious House of Malevecchio.

APTO marine algorithm theorists believe that the House of Malevecchio is secretly diverting office supplies from the Cretaceous to some period outside the Phanerozoic for use by marine cryptid and alleged supervillain Neptune Slaughter.

Fiction cross-reference

Nonfiction cross-reference

External links

Social media

  • Post @ Twitter (23 June 2022)
  • Post @ Twitter (27 April 2021)
  • Post @ Twitter (27 April 2021)
  • Post @ Twitter (7 April 2021) - "You insisted, so we existed!"
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